theme
white light

on the first day of june, i felt
these last months behind
me, suddenly, in silence
white light bleeding
through every crack in my skin
my dreams began to fade again
into reality, and further, further

its not long now until i will leave
the sunlight will glow behind me
my soul lighter than
your eyelashes in the morning

if you hold me even for a second
i will never dream again
the white light will blind me
blur my soul at the edges
if you hold me even
for a second

how do i prove

the shades of copper
have followed me through these seasons
in the bark of trees and
the circles under your eyes

the skin of your hands
turns the color of fawn
after you’ve been in the sun
for a while too long
i watch you change
like the soil of this earth

you are the splashes on rocks
of the fringe of a waterfall
i am my own head against my bedroom wall

how do i prove to you
while soft sunlight pours
in on our faces, that i am alive?

you believe in god
but i’m not sure i understand you

but i don’t believe
in anyone else but you

how do i prove to you
while soft sunlight pours
in on our eyes,
that i am alive?

galloway, nj

ascend

forests

somers point

you appeared in my subconsciousness
after a long drought:
months without your voice
emerging from the layers of my mind

you were draped in white
and the air around you glimmered
as if you were an angel

you opened your arms. knelt down
and held me

your hands and
the nape of your neck
soft and familiar
but bound from me by time
like the last few days of april

your hands and
the nape of your neck
were soft and familiar

and woven of dreams

i am a blackslathed ghost
freak wandering the sides of busy roads
the wind brings tiny fractures to my jaw
sewn shut like the rest of me
a nightmare of who i used to be
i cover my ears from the blur
shake
cower from even smiling men
to hide in the caves of my stomach
lowest lows
dangerous crave shots
sick twisted fear shakes
cut at me like blunt blades
i let the sun dry my tears
i blind myself on hallway floors
i try to translate the jumbled mess
of pure emotion and deep earth screams
that leaves my lips
into tangible words
but they slip through minds and under doors
just like the rest of me
a ghost of who i used to be